Give Our Lives A Chance

Hello! I'm Mariam from a french-speaking country in West Africa so I apologize if my English seems a bit low. I come from a very conservative Muslim family but I am not Muslim. I do not adhere to this religion and I do not have the same beliefs as them. Because I refuse to pray like them I am treated differently, I am forbidden from touching their food because I am dirty, they act as if I no longer exist and I suffer emotional distress. I'm in therapy with a Psychologist and I'm trying to cope but I can't take it anymore. I feel like I have to apologize for being my true self. I have always had a toxic family, my father has always been abusive and violent with my mother, my siblings and me but we no longer live with him. He is living a new life with a new family so we no longer suffer physical violence but the relationship between me and my mother has worsened. I don't know if it's the result of all those years of abuse but she's behaving mentally abusive, she's trying to control me emotionally and I can't take it anymore. I am 24 years old and for as long as I can remember my family environment has always been abusive either physically or emotionally or even both at the same time. I suffered from depression several times and had suicidal thoughts very often but I survived thanks to Music. Music allowed me to find hope and if thanks to Music I can give even a little bit of hope to those who need it then I will dedicate my life to Music. I've wanted to be a singer for several years now but I don't really have any particular talent and I can't afford a professional vocal and music instructor in order to try to find my potential. My family also doesn't want me to do Music because it's against their religion and it's not a real profession according to them. I'm not even allowed to raise my voice at home when I try to sing in order to work on my voice. They don't support me at all but Music is the only thing I've ever wanted to do so far and I know that if I'm given the means I will work hard to achieve my goals. However I have no resources, I can't even stay here because terrorism is spreading in the country and my family has turned their back on me, I don't feel safe here. I need help to get out of here so please help me. My sister is almost in the same situation, she got pregnant without being married with a man who abandoned her and the family is of no help to her. They say that she is a disgrace to them and they are mentally abusing her without a care for her pregnancy. I am really worried about her and the baby, she is the only member I can still consider as family so please help us. It's probably because we are girls that they treat us that way, they care more for the boys and it truly hurts but we can't even complain because we are voiceless, we don't have the right to complain, we just have to do as they wish and suffer in silence. We endured it so far but it's just too much, we can't take it any longer. It feels like we are trapped by our supposed family in a country that is unsafe without any exit to escape through. We no longer know who to turn to, please, if you can help us escape from this situation in any way, then we would be very grateful.